Alterations for Pony Boot Camp (VI)

The usual maintenance, you know the drill…

~

Part XXXX:

Gathering quick momentum from the waist, I brought my horse shoe armoured forehoof around and delivered a beautifully executed sucker punch straight to her left tit.

is changed into:

Gathering quick momentum from my waspie’d waist, I brought my horse shoe armoured forehoof around and delivered a beautifully executed sucker punch straight to her left tit.

Only a quick reminder that Seventeen’s mobility is somewhat compromised. She can still twist around her vertical axis, though, with the known result.

~

Part XXXXII:

One of the cooks, thin as a stick, offered me a bowl of müesli.

is commented as followed:

This is just me being a smart-arse. There seems to be some confusion about the correct spelling of müesli, which has led me to put it in the story in this particular variant. Since it was invented by a Swiss physician and applied in practice in his Swiss sanatorium, it is safe to say that the Swiss-German spelling, müesli, is the correct one. The “German”-German variant, müsli, is bound to cause some eye-rolling with our Southern neighbours – in Swiss-German, a müsli is a small mouse. The English form, muesli, has either lost the umlaut dots from the Swiss original, or replaced the ü in the non-Swiss spelling with the standard transcription ue.

~

Part XXXXII:

This time the Eswren decide to be massive dicks about it, so they hurl her into the dungeon, where the fun part starts at last.

is changed into:

This time the Eswren decide to be massive dicks about it, so they hurl her snobby arse into the dungeon, where the fun part starts at last.

It sounds better, simple as that. Plus, it fits both the tongue-in-cheekiness of Seventeen’s “synopsis” of the book and her general dislike of the main character.

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About Venom

Bloke from Central Europe; Petrol Head; Observer of Human Depravity View all posts by Venom

2 responses to “Alterations for Pony Boot Camp (VI)

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